Who determines whether you are a GOOD mom?
How do we know if we’re a GOOD mom or not?
Most women answer that question with, “I’m close with my kids. They tell me their stuff. They tell me regularly I’m a good mom.” Or “Many people comment to me that I’m a good mom.” “My husband regularly tells me that.”
We Christian Mamas tend to fall into the trap of, “Well, my kids love Jesus, or they are following God’s plan for their lives, or they behave and obey me the first time I ask them to do something.”
But do those things REALLY determine whether or not we are GOOD mothers? No, they don’t.
Because there will be days when nobody takes the time to tell us that. There may be days when our kids tell us we are the worst mom ever. And there will be days when our kids aren’t making all the right choices and will we still believe we are GOOD moms?
Sadly, the truth is, we usually don’t. Because we have farmed out our own emotional wealth to someone else without realizing that it’s always been an INSIDE JOB!
Of course, it’s wonderful when we get outside validation of a job well done. But many times when my clients are hurting over something their child is doing or not doing, I usually ask them, “What are you making ______________________ mean about YOU?”
And it usually gets quiet and I patiently wait for the lightbulb of revelation to shine. And when it does, it is followed by a deep breath (and sometimes tears) and the true FREEDOM that comes from the realization that their own personal worth was never and is never tied to SOMEONE ELSE’S behavior!
And guess what? It doesn’t come from YOUR behavior either! That’s the GRACE of God moving in your life every single day! Because none of us are PERFECT! God doesn’t expect perfection from us Mamas because Jesus ALREADY DID IT ALL PERFECTLY for us!
And if you happen to live with a teenager, you know firsthand that even when you ARE doing great, they may still tell you that you suck, lol 😉
I hope this encourages your heart today and gives you a tiny mindset shift that defaulting to making your child’s accomplishments mean something about you, good or bad, will always be subservient to what God calls you; a worthy, loved, beautiful, and altogether lovely Mama who was hand-picked by Him and entrusted to be the keeper of little hearts.
We all have days that we SHINE as moms and days we’d rather not remember, right? We sometimes show up as a GOOD NURTURER and sometimes as a BAD NURTURER, but that doesn’t mean we are a BAD MOM. It means we are a HUMAN MOM! That means WE get to just decide to believe, I am a GOOD MOM. Because it’s always our THOUGHTS, that will create our FEELINGS and our FEELINGS that will drive our ACTIONS!
If you want to start showing up as the GOOD Mama that you want to be, it starts with BELIEVING that first, and renewing your mind with GOD’S TRUE THOUGHTS about you! And I can help! I help support moms every single day to learn how to let go of unrealistic expectations that only cause them pain, and restore the JOY to their motherhood journey and I can help you, too! Hit the COACH WITH ME link and let’s chat about working together! It’ll be the BEST investment you’ve ever made in YOURSELF and your family! ~Be Blessed, Jenny
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~JENNY RIEFLIN MINISTRIES~ 